Logic of Children

My kids are allowed to buy their lunches from the school two days a week (have you seen the prices since we were in school?!?!). Usually on the night before they are going to take their lunches, I will have the kids start getting them ready after supper. Getting them ready means putting their applesauce and a spoon in the box, putting their cookies in a baggie and putting them in the box, choosing their chips and putting them in the box...you get the picture. Last night, I managed to forget this whole process. Imagine my thoughts as I laid in bed last night at 11:30 and realized that I had to get up this morning and completely prepare 3 lunches since not one of them had chose to buy today. I was not happy. This morning, I get up, throw on a pair of jeans, let the dogs out, and went to wake the kids. I found Older Son, whom I did not see before turning on the light, in the hall headed towards the bathroom. The only thing I saw when I hit that light switch was a white ghost. Technically it was his t-shirt he had picked out but still gave me a heart attack. I went through the motions...what are you wearing today...what kind of chips do you want...what kind of sandwich do you want? I head off to the kitchen to start this crap while pushing the kids to hurry up and get dressed, the bus will be here in 20 minutes. By this time, Older Son is already dressed, having had a head start and is working on finding his socks. About halfway through lunches, I've seen Daughter dressed holding her shoes, told Older Son to brush his teeth, and went to check on Younger Son and found him dressed with one shoe on. No big deal, they were doing good this morning and better than most mornings. Until Daughter decided at the same time Younger Son finished getting dressed that she had to potty. She steps in the bathroom and shuts the door, later swearing that she had no idea that he was finished and about to brush his teeth, when not 10 seconds later he goes to open that door. She screams, "I've got my pants down!!!" loud enough the neighbors can hear it. I tell Younger Son to wait a minute and let her potty and then he can brush his teeth. No big deal right?? Wrong!! After 3 or 4 minutes of waiting, they are still arguing back and forth through the door, with Older Son joining in by this point, because he wants to blow his nose. So I go to the hallway, tell the boys to back off, and step in the bathroom to find Daughter holding her shorts halfway up, complaining she still has her pants down, that she has to potty and Younger Son wouldn't leave the door alone. In other words, when she could've and should've been finished pottying, she hadn't even started and the bus would be running in less than 5 minutes. I run her to my bathroom, her complaining the entire time and me telling her that she should've been finished by then, Younger Son needed to brush his teeth and the bus would be there in a minute and she'd best hurry if she was not going to miss it. The boys got in the bathroom, she broke down into tears since I'm the horrible mother that sent her to the bathroom with a toilet that didn't hold the kids toothbrushes. She came back out, boys were out of the bathroom, I threw her hair into a ponytail as she brushed her teeth. We didn't miss the bus, thank goodness, but my blood pressure was up. I dread the teens...