Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Standing My Ground

Today, I read a blog about pushover parenting and had to comment. I have seen the product of pushover parenting. The kids that come to your home and behaves until mom shows up and then all manners they used here goes out the window. Or the child that comes to your home to misbehave and secretly hope that you will discipline them because they need and crave boundaries. Boundaries that their mom and dad doesn't set down at home. Part of me is scared that I am becoming a pushover parent. I have been known to give bribes in order to secure some sort of resemblance of peace in my home, especially when the arguments start. I am ashamed to admit that I have been known to raise my voice when they do something stupid or when they argue with me.

Then there was today. I have not raised my voice today. I have stood my ground when I told the kids to do something. Belle and Brady both had basketball practices this afternoon at different times. I made it clear before we left the house for both practices that they were to take something that they would be sitting down with. The boys took a book for Belle's practice. Bryce read his book while Brady quietly played with one of the other players little sister. For Brady's practice, Bryce took Hot Wheels and Belle took her game boy. When Belle wanted to get up and wander around, I made her sit down. When she started to defy me, I stood my ground until she did what I told her to do. They were all put in bed at 7:30 tonight, so that maybe they would sleep soundly and get up without an argument in the morning. This has been a big accomplishment for me and is something I plan to do tomorrow. If my head doesn't explode from the frustration and pressure of standing my ground.

2 comments:

M said...

Shanna part of being a parent is being a pushover. Yes I admit I've been there many times too. I figure I must have done ok since I have such good kids to be proud of.Don't be too hard on yourself just accept that there are times it is a part of raising kids

ShortyMom said...

It's more out of frustration that I am working on this. I am tired of the sassing, the back-talking, and the just down right not doing something when I tell them to. If I say sit, they stand up, if I say take a shower it can take up to twenty minutes for them to get in. I think if they can be "wonderful kids" at other peoples homes (I'm told this all the time) then they can behave better when they're here.