Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Cruelty

It's no secret that kids can be cruel to each other. I think that most everyone can admit to being the victim of some act at the hand of another child when they were growing up. I know I was a time or two. My kids are no different. They have been the victim and they have been the instigator. When I catch them in the act or hear about them being involved in it, I let them know that it's wrong. That they should not stoop to the level of the person that has done things to them and while they listen to me with their ears, it doesn't always sink in. I fussed at them just this afternoon for yelling remarks at another child and stopped it. I am naive to expect it from other parents, but it seems more and more parents overlook the behavior of their children.

Over the last few weeks, the cruelty has been going to new levels. Bryce has fallen victim to a "joke" that was no laughing matter. The pain that we have gone through and that he is still going through because of the "joke" hurts and causes me to see so much red. I know that I should be walking the christian walk, but it's hard when your child has fallen victim to a prank as bad as this one was. Belle has been at odds with the neighbor child that she played with often. Over most of the last week, Belle has been whispered about, ignored, and made of fun. Because of an issue that occurred yesterday on the bus, I let her know that if she was uncomfortable sitting with the child on the bus (they have an assigned seat together) that she should mention it to the driver or monitor so they could move one of them. They moved Belle this afternoon after she mentioned what happened yesterday. Of course, the other child failed to mention to her parents that she blocked Belle from getting off the bus. It should have been no surprise when her step-dad knocked on my door this afternoon wanting to know if I had said something to my daughter. He had a chip on his shoulder (something that I've known about from previous encounters) and acted as if she was perfect and could have never blocked Belle from getting off the bus. Mind you that he was kind of stumped when I mentioned the incident as if he didn't have a clue that it had happened. Said he just wanted to know if "I knew about it." Yes, I did know about it. Well before he did. He's lucky that all that happened is that Belle changed seats on the bus. I could've mentioned it to the driver. Hubby has been wanting to speak with the child about what has been going on because we have told her (and our own kids) before that we won't tolerate this backstabbing thing, that has happened more than once. Am I wrong to want to protect my children? I know things like this are going to happen, but when a parent knocks on my door acting as if his child is the victim when it was my child that moved? I could understand if they had moved her from her seat but that was not the case. Belle's seat was changed. Their child is not the one who has been subjected to ridicule, whispers and remarks like "I should've farted in Belle's face." My child was and I'm sure they have not been informed of that remark. But the parent is one that seldom allows me to finish a sentence before he interrupts. So informing him of how my child has become victim to his step child was impossible. So I'm frustrated beyond belief.

This frustration is compounded by the fact that Brady is exhausted. He has pitched 8 different fits tonight, most of them with tears, for many different reasons. It's been a long afternoon even though they've only been home about 5 hours now. I can only hope tomorrow will improve.

2 comments:

M said...

It sounds to me as if the kids your kids are dealing with are products of their enviroment and as hard as it is you need to look at the fact that your are raising your kids to know when they are wrong and that your kids will go places in life because of the people you are raising them to be. I know this is hard I have been there many times. It doesn't improve with the ages of the kids it improves with the instincts and morals you raise yours with
hope it gets better soon
*hugs*
chelle

Ladybird said...

I hope that things pan out. I hate the "perfect child" parent. Lord knows I was not the perfect child and I know that my child will not be either. Let me know if I need to come kick your neighbor in the shin. I can still run pretty fast for a pregnant woman.